Got this off a friendster bulletin. And I think it's really sweet.
Guys, you should really do these stuff for the girl you like/love. :)

A lot of things in the list you've done for me,
and I realise how lucky I am to have you.


Every girl dreams that one day she will find a boy that does these things for her.
Even the smallest action can have the BIGGEST impact in someone's life.

• give her one of your t-shirts to sleep in. :)

• leave her cute text notes. :)

• kiss her in front of your friends. :)

• tell her she looks beautiful. :)

• look into her eyes when you talk to her. :)

• let her mess with your hair. :)

• touch her hair. :)

• just walk around with her. :)

• forgive her for her mistakes. :)

• look at her like she's the only girl you see. :)

• tickle her even when she says stop. :)

• hold her hand when you're around your friends. :)

• when she starts swearing at you, tell her you love her.

• let her fall asleep in your arms. :)

• get her mad, then kiss her.

• tease her and let her tease you back. :)

• stay up all night with her when she's sick. :)

• watch her favorite movie with her.

• kiss her forehead. :)

• give her the world.

• write her letters.

• let her wear your clothes. :)

• when she's sad, hang out with her. :)

• let her know she's important. :)

• let her take all the photos she wants of you. :)

• kiss her in the pouring rain.

• when you fall in love with her, tell her. :)

• and when you tell her, love her like you've never loved someone before. :)




-



On another note, my promoter job for NIVEA ends this weekend. And I'm very sad! This is my favourite job ever. :'( nice people, nice environment, nice products.

I'll miss eating at a very unusually uncrowded kopitiam during lunch!
I'll miss giving out my flyers to anyone who possesses a 12 yr old and above d*ck.
I'll miss you Yayan! :( Even though I've only known you for 3 weeks! You've been a great friend all along. :) Heee.
I'll miss talking about men's skincare products and sunscreen. (oh, I finally realised that sun tan lotion and sun block are completely different. HAHA. I'm such a bimbo smart person.)
I'll miss all the aunties!
I'll even miss Virginia, the manager who gave all the promoters a scolding briefing on my first day!


AHHH. I'M SO SADDED. :(((((

Ohwell. At least my stint at Vivo Daiso is OVER. LIKE FINALLY. The people there are so anal and BITCHY with a capital B in CAPS, and suffer from perpetual PMS, poor them. Or maybe they just have sticks and stones up their arses.

Today count items until yan hua liao. Anyhow count lah don't care. LOL. But they were nice to give us a break and longer lunch. woots.

And then this idiot supervisor/manager/I don't give a flying fuck actually, came to check on my shelf when I was done counting the stock on it. Apparently before hand, some idiot staff actually came to put a Daiso brush, belonging to the office, on the shelf, among the brushes. And how the hell would I know it is a Daiso brush????! So obviously I counted it; and the supervisor was going nuts.

SV: walau! its our brush you counted lah!! *calls other permanent staff and hands her the brush, like she got no hands of her own to put it in its rightful position*
Me: oh. sorry, didn't know lah.
SV: you work here before right, how come you don't know!
Me: *rolls eyes* (thinks to myself: ONLY THREE FUCKING DAYS, BITCH..)
SV: you ah!

AND SHE SLAPS MY THIGH OHMYGOD WHO IN HELL DOES SHE THINK SHE IS.



*(^!@#!.



Dingdong,
Imissyou.


If I wrote a play,
could you be my inspiration?


I was in church yesterday morning and the gospel reading for this weekend of Lent was how Jesus raised Lazarus from the dead. And you know, normally during sermons all I think about is
(________________________________________)


ie, nothing.

For some reason though I began thinking about who God is.
And I came up with a couple of theories:
(if you are a strong and devoted and staunch Christian who believes God is the almighty Omega [which I believe too lah], please don't read on.
Disclaimer: this is just what I thinking about during the boring sermon. Don't sue me.)

Theory No. 1:
That God is not really some great giant being up there in heaven who has supreme magic powers. He's just a sort of benchmark for all of us to be kind, loving and compassionate human beings. Like, he's just a guide to what humans should be. Human conscience.
They always say God is in our hearts. So maybe in our hearts refer to our conscience.

Theory No. 2:
That Jesus got his powers and gifts and all that by using a larger portion of his brain and will power. You know, how it's been proven that we only use like uhh 5% or something of our brains, and Einstein used 10% ? Maybe Jesus used like 20% or something? Or more.
The bible states that you can move mountains if you just believe. Maybe believe means thinking hard enough and using more brain juice. Then we don't need to use dynamite to open up mines. :D

Theory 3:
And I was reading this book that day in the library about UFOs and all that! And APPARENTLY!
This is so interesting: if you take a look at alot of historic paintings, alot of em will have what looks like UFOs hovering in the skies. Oooo. There was this painting of the Annunciation, which is where Mary gets a visit from an archangel who gives her the Holy Spirit and she becomes pregnant with Jesus. There was this UFO-ish thing in the sky outside Mary's window.
Oooo.
So the book was like suggesting that perhaps God is really an extra terrestrial being.
HMMM. Isn't that like Scientology?
Hello, Tom Cruise.


And I'm so scared I'll go to Hell for saying all this. I'm just wondering, though, and sharing my thoughts with y'al. =/ weird as they may seem.

Erm. Okay never mind.
I shall just go back to being a good little Catholic school girl.
*swings pigtails*
I don't really believe in those theories lah, as arresting as they seem to me.
They're just a fine way to keep me occupied and not asleep during sermons.
x)



Mary: Where's Fran?
Steve: She's in Tahiti, on our honeymoon.
- The Wedding Planner, featuring Jennifer Lopez and Matthew McConaughey


Feel like quitting my job, seriously. No motivation to work, least not anymore.


On another note,
I wondered today if a fear of consequences is the one thing that shapes one's life.

eg.
- You fear losing my handphone if you leave it on the table.
- You fear losing money if you decide to play mahjong.
- You fear losing someone dear if you said something offensive to them.
- You fear being late if you slept a little longer.
- You fear getting pregnant if you go too far.
- You fear getting expelled if you kick the teacher's nuts.
- You fear feeling pain so you just don't love.

For some that fear is seemingly nonexistent, they play it down so much til they themselves cease to acknowledge that they are indeed fearful of something, one way or another.

But if we ceased to fear, how different would our lives and decisions be?
Reckless decision-making. Chaotic society. Baby boom.

All of us have so many fears.
But why do we even have them?
And the most basic fear, an innate fear - a fear of bu kan she xiang consequences.

I read this book once, about this girl who didn't have the fear gene, depicted to have absolutely no fear - I wonder how she felt. Not to have felt fear and all.
Ahwell.


I fear:
[x] making a mess out of my life.
[x] doing ridiculous things for a living.
[x] losing optimism.
[x] deep water.
[x] escalators, lifts.
[x] anything that has 6 legs or more.
[x] losing you.
[x] not being able to be in your embrace anymore.
[x] my loved ones dying while I'm still alive.
[x] losing the trust of my friends.
[x] becoming cold-hearted.
[x] cold places.
[x] dirt.


And I realise, I fear so many things.


I guess I should be happy with my results, seeing your tags and all.
But I really am not, because I dropped, and I feel so fucking pissed because despite working hard my gpa didn't improve. And gpa is bloody important to me because it determines whether or not I have a future at a university.

AHHHH.

Anyway, working at daiso and nivea for 5 days straight has left me with trembling calves. Standing for 8 hrs straight, cannot sit down, is really good if you want to firm up your legs. Ohoh, and more so if you have to squat down/kneel down to reach low shelves and tiptoe to reach shelves high up.

Ah I am dead tired.
I am starting to sprout nonsense from my ears.
I am hearing things with my mouth.



Beneath the milky twilight,
Lead me out on the moonlit floor;
Lift your open hand,
Strike up the band and make the fireflies dance,
Silver moon's sparkling...
So kiss me.

fuck.

i feel so pissed. so so pissed. like all my efforts are wasted. so much for studying so hard and getting As, I still can't get an increased GPA. fuck finance. fucking finance (yay, it rhymes). cos of this wonderful subject, my gpa decreases 0.017, from 3.447.

ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. *very very very pissed*

Some lecturers should just go hang themselves over a roaring fire.

I never realised how small Bishan Park really was. I'd always thought it was a sprawling mass of greenery stretched across achres upon achres of exclusively limited Seengarpour land.

We sat there, laid on the rocks and watched the stars, the sole two orbs that evening that glittered vivaciously beside crimson stained clouds.

Me and you, I said, those two stars.
We're holding hands behind the clouds!

As cheesy as it sounded, it was a sweet notion, at least to me.
And as time went by and the evening got darker, it was time to leave.

But it always pains me when we're on the way home.
Because it always means we have to part,
and parting is never sweet sorrow, it's always.. just sorrow.
I wish I'd never left your embrace, to be honest.


The afternoon at Bishan had been splendid;
♥ you buying the tickets while I stood aside, sneaking into GV to watch 300, which is an awesome movie, by the way, with stimulating (oh, nudity, where art thou nudity) visuals and flawless battles strategies. Seeing it makes me want to go be a man, get bulging muscles, and go stick pointy things in people's throats. :D

♥ us sitting down to kfc. i love! and then to cafe cartel for salad and dessert (chocolate brownies with hot fudge and vanilla icecream! *slurps*) while we had our Operation Rescue discussion. Teehee.

♥ playing that jungle arcade game with you. OMG, giant spiderssssss! Thou shall never step into any area that encompasses more than 5 trees anymore in thy life. *horrified* LOL!

♥ us watching the Mr. Bean mascot with his tua tou doing that silly groin dance (which is just plain neurotic) and, and, and! FOXXXXXXX. nice green tubbbbe! *hint* =P
EHHH, if they have a spring/summer line right, how long will the stuff be on the shelves before they bring in a new season's line and take out the previous season's wear?

♥ the walk to the park, which was alot of fun. and then more walking, to the coffee shop.
yes, it's our secret. :)


But when it was time to leave, i felt.. sadness. Like the rain that collected above me in the clouds had suddenly been lifted to the depths of my heart. Why? I don't know, I always feel that way when we're about to part.

We got on the bus when you were about to send me home, and I stood close, next to you, while I gripped the railings on that crowded bus. I moved to put my wallet back into my bag, and the old man sitting on the seat in front of me dodged, as if I was about to hit him with my wallet.

A few stops later, that old man was about to alight, and his grandson dropped the old man's ezlink under the seat. It infuriated the old man, and his wife's chiding led to further his already building embarassment and frustration.

And because I was standing next to him, in front of the door, he decided to raise his voice at me,
Excuse me, I want to alight!

Like I could not recognise that he was trying to get off the bus.
But I kept silent, like what I always do, and tried to squeeze a path for him amidst the crowd that was rushing to get off the bus.
But you argued back for me, thank you.
And I didn't even realise it because I thought the crazy man was shouting at us, and the people behind us.

Thank you, my love. I am sincerely touched that a boy stood up for me. ♥


Tag replies:
kel: yes I do! 15% i think. Not sure about how to go about getting the discount, tho. heee.
manda: my money will be sent to the needy in Africa.
.. lol. no lah, for new phone lah. =)
zaf: yeah, will try! i almost got myself into a 12day working spree. lol. ALMOST. anw most of the enthusiasm sprouts from these four words - "NEW PHONE NEW PHONE"
laura: anti-lovers should just eat more chocolate.
AK: haha. yeah. you should have seen his face. i don't know whether it was utter joy or utter lecherousness at its best. i don't want to know. lol.
elaine: you felt it ah! i didn't leh. :( lols
cin: so you're not working ar? aiyo. cannot! think about all those heels you need to get! =) hehe
matthew: yeah, as deep as rabbits go. LOL :D


I'm working at Compass Point at Watsons, as a promoter for NIVEA, namely NIVEA for Men and Nivea Sun Care, 12 - 8 pm every weekend. And the pay is pretty nice too, so I like.







The only thing that sucks is the having to stand for 8 hours straight. So it's been like, 24 hours in total of standing, and my feet hurt like hell. :(


And, a completely whack supervisor, who, hello, you're not even the person we're supposed to report to in the first place. I should make like the L'Oreal girl and start rolling over-eyeshadowed eyes at her.


I've sold 33 bottles so far! :D okay, which isn't that great, but it's a start! :D:D:D


And gosh, there was this weird guy yesterday.
I passed him a flyer and told him about our promotion, where if you make a purchase with any product from our NIVEA for Men line, you'll get a free high-quality toiletry bag and a 15ml face wash for either oily or dry skin.


So he wanted the free gift and so decided to take a look at our products. I got him to do the 10 second skin test, and he was talking and laughing and what crap. So he decided to get the set for oily skin, which is above 15bucks.




And I thanked him and went off to get the toiletry bag.
*shivers*




Plus I'm working at Daiso too, from the 19th to 27th, except during the weekend where I'm at NIVEA. Hoho.

$_$

♥

How you doin', young lady, the feelin' that you givin' drives me crazy.

Singapore was hit by tremors today!

Tuesday, March 06, 2007 ( 12:15 PM )

And if a country like Singapore (which is nearly unsusceptible to natural disasters) can kena earthquake, or such strong tremors,
GAHHHHHHHH!


This signals very baaaaaaaaaad climate changes to come.
=/








!!!!!

The Art of Giving is a masterpiece. NOT.

Sunday, March 04, 2007 ( 9:27 PM )

8 months ago, I posted this.
And now, I feel it again.
And I’m sorry.

I don’t believe
In the smile that you leave
When you walk away
And say goodbye
I don’t expect the world to move underneath me
But for God’s sake,
Could you try?

I know that you’re true to me
You’re always there
You say you care
I know that you wanna be mine.

Where is your heart?
Cos I don’t really feel you;
Where is your heart?
What I really want is to believe you;
Is it so hard, to give me what I need:
All I want is your heart to bleed.
That’s all I’m asking for.

I don’t understand
Your love is so cold
It’s always me who’s reaching out for your hand
And I’ve always dreamed that love would be effortless
Like a petal falling to the ground, a dreamer following his dream

It seems so much is left unsaid
But you can say anything
Oh, anytime you need
Baby, it’s just you… and me.


How many of you out there,
feel like you’re constantly giving so much,
maybe it’s for love,
maybe it’s for a friend,
maybe it’s for your family.
Or maybe, it’s just for yourself.
But you don’t feel like you getting anything back, at least not as much as you’d like?
And you’re in constant pain,
Butif you say anything, you're afraid that you’ll hurt someone.
Or seriously change something that you’ve worked so hard to achieve, most probably for the worst.

Like that project you’ve slaved over. Or the parent who refuses to talk to you. Or the friend who seems to be growing distant. Or the loved one you seem to be giving so much to, but who doesn’t seem to reciprocate as much as you’d like.

Whatever it is that you’re putting effort into,
But don’t seem to see any results for.

Why is it that tears are never enough,
That the aching never seems to go away,
That your mind always comes back to what you’ve been trying all year to forget;

It’s that little voice at the back of your head,
That’s telling you to keep going for it,
When your heart tells you to stop,
Because you see heartbreak a yard away,
Snapping its rancid jaws at you;

And no matter how you try,
You can’t stop, you can’t, you just can’t.
Even though you want so badly to stop thinking about it,
You know it’s bad for you,
It’s like an addiction,
Like a bad pill you can’t stop popping,
Like those thoughts that keep running through your ever-analyzing head,
Like that love you can’t put away into the dusty corner of your heart, no matter how hard you tell your heart to forget.

No matter what they tell you,
Even though you know you shouldn’t be thinking about it at all,
That you should just stop, and put some trust in yourself,
And the one(s) you love.

But,

You can’t stop wondering if it’s all right at all,
Because you honestly don’t know.
At all.
Not anymore.


***


I’m honestly tired.
So, so tired.
And I wish I could just put an end to all this,
But there’d be too much I’d leave behind,
That I can’t bear to abandon.

It’s just one vicious cycle, ain’t it?
And in a thousand and one ways, everyone can relate to this.



I’ve hurt myself by hurting you.

I’m only confiding in you, because I trust you wholeheartedly.

So tell me, please.
Where is your heart?

Sometimes? Only?

That's a real spear to the heart. :(

Quiz #(I'm lazy to check)

Saturday, March 03, 2007 ( 7:28 PM )

Ripped from Anjana's blog.

1.Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?
Yes, please.

2. Are you crushin on someone?
Yes! The soccer guy from hana kimi. :D:D:D:D

3. Have you ever liked someone so much that it hurt?
Yes, too many times.

4. Have you ever made a boyfriend or girlfriend cry?
Yes, *guilty* as charged.
Tears of sorrow, and of joy.

5. Are you happier single or in a relationship?
I like being in a r/s, where there's always somewhere there for you, to comfort you and give you a hug/kiss when you need one, someone you can care for and love. :)

6. Have you ever cheated on someone?
No.
I do not support polygamy. At all.
*frowns*

7. Have you ever told someone you loved them and didn't mean it?
No, I don't lie about such sensitive topics.

8. Have you ever had your heart broken?
:(
Yes, many times over the years.

9. Talk to any of your exes?
Don't have any.

10. If you could go back in time and change things, would you?
No, I love things the way they are.
What's there to change?

11. Think any of your exs feel the same?
Did you not hear that I don't have any.

12. Are you a good girlfriend or boyfriend?
I really don't know.
That's not for me to judge.
*nudges old rooster*
But I guess sometimes, I'm not the best and most understanding gf, and sometimes PMS gets hold of me and makes me a monster. =X

13. Have you been in an abusive relationship?
No? I hope not.

14. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance?
It depends on the crime you've committed.

15. Do you believe in love at first sight?
No, since I've never experienced it.
But I think that some lucky/misguided people might translate their initial lust into love, so they fall in love at first sight.
So maybe it's possible.
You never know, with hormonal surges and all.

16. Do you want to get married?
Hmmm.
I don't want to answer that.
But..
it's dawned on me recently that it's not that far away anymore. :)

17. Has anyone ever told you they wanted to marry you?
Yes.

18. Ever liked someone else's boyfriend or girlfriend?
Nuh uh.
I like my candy and I don't need anybody else's.
:D
Eh wait. I can't rmb lah.
Not now, but maybe some time ago.
=x

19. Does heartbreak really feel as bad as it sounds?
Costs your heart even more pain than is always often publicised.


______________________________________________________



How can you tell when to stop listening to your heart?

Am fucking happy because the exams are over.
But then I am fucking annoyed because I am fucking bored to my wit's end because I have fucking nothing to do.
I need to get a job, fast.

I thought PSM was pretty okay. And PMM was easy, I think? Because everything I memorized from the risky 5 chapters I studied came out!! Was happy happy like a happy humpback whale.

And I think Azhar caught me smiling, cos when I was walking out of the hall he stopped me and said,
"Cherylene, the paper easy right?"
With a wicked smile.

God.
SCARY.
:- l

And finance ah.
I'm ready to take subs if need be.
:(
I hate balance sheets.
Who on earth invented accounts must be shot.
Why need to think so much about money huh.
Got money just use lah.
Must count here count there.
So much free time ah!
Tsktsk.
:((((

And I wanted to say something..
But uhh.
uhh. I can't rmb.

And! I am addicted to iVillage.
Me loves. :D



Lip-synch;
Seeing you smile after it all, makes my heart smile.