is to love and be loved.
Wednesday, November 29, 2006 ( 12:20 AM )
Sometimes I feel you pull me down,
like I'll forever be stuck beneath you,
feeling like even if I've struck out successfully on my own,
I'll never be able to enjoy the fruits of my labour,
because you're there,
and I need to save you.
Not that I'm complaining, because it is my duty and responsibility to rescue you,
but I would like my help to be appreciated,
and for you to stop making me feel like I'm just one of the many,
that I don't matter,
because I do matter.
And I wonder why you worry so much about others,
when you can't even save yourself,
and when I ask you to help me,
you're too busy,
because you're too busy helping others;
And when I get some rare opportunity to speak to you about how I feel,
you cut me off saying it's just a green streak,
when really, it's not;
And it amazes me how everything is always my fault in your eyes,
amazing how I'm a person with so many flaws in your eyes,
how even though I help out so much,
you criticise and say my help wasn't sincere.
And it really breaks my heart,
it really does,
when you do the things you do;
I love you,
but sometimes,
I wish I never had you.
I wish you were there for me when I needed you,
instead of pretending to trying so hard for others who don't care at the time when I want a hug from you;
I envy other people who have their yous right by their side whenever they need them.
I envy other people whose yous helped them out as much as they needed.
I envy other people who have their yous who care for them and supported them all the way.
And sometimes,
it feels like you were never there,
even though you're right there beside me,
pretending I wasn't there.
Where are you?